Self Portrait by Jan Levinson

W&L Creative Writing

Winter 2022

OCTOBER 20, 2018

Hello, hello, hello! It is your FAVORITE critic of The Office, Pat MacCarther, here to review yet another episode! Thanks to all of my loyal readers, your humor and support is what makes this blog so amazing!

I know you’ve all been asking for a review of my favorite episode, so I’m giving you what you want: “Dinner Party,” season 4 episode 9 of the greatest show to be created, the Office.

For those of you who haven’t seen this episode, watch it. But, I’ll give the brief breakdown of what we have going on here. The crazy manager of Dunder Mifflin Paper Company, Michael Scott, is a few months into his relationship with Jan Levinson, his former boss. Jan got fired from her position a few episodes back for, essentially, going off the rails. She and Michael broke up a few months before, but she won him back by doing something she knew without a shadow of a doubt would break him: got a MASSIVE boob job. Everyone thinks the two of them are insane, and nobody wants to spend time with them. Michael basically dupes two of his workers Jim Halpert and his girlfriend, receptionist Pam Beesley, to attend a dinner party at his condo by making sure they had no plans, therefore no excuses to say no, by creating a fake overtime assignment on a Friday night. Yep, he’s that desperate to get them over. 

Jim and Pam head over to his condo after work, accompanied by salesman Andy and his girlfriend Angela. Jan reveals that dinner will take an additional three hours to be served, so the three couples engage in a bunch of ice breaker games. The quirky salesman Dwight Shrute ends up crashing the dinner with his sixty year old babysitter, because Michael had told him he wasn’t allowed to come because he didn’t have a date. Once dinner is served, Michael and Jan get into huge fights that lead to a broken TV, the cops showing up, and the termination of Michael and Jan’s relationship for good. 

The true star of this episode is Jan Levinson. My husband Frank and I quite literally were on the floor with her antics. Through bits both subtle and huge, the episode reveals how crazy and abusive she really is. When they give a tour of their bedroom, Jan scolds Michael for not putting away the camera and tripod pointing directly at their bed. If you remember from season 3 episode 21, Michael tells the ladies of the office how Jan films them having sex, makes him watch it back to improve his game, and also watches their sex tapes with her therapist. Clearly, judging by the camera still in the room, she hasn’t changed as much as she told Michael she would when she got the boob job!

Jan goes on to play a CD by her former assistant, the sexy 20-year-old named Hunter. Michael had always been a bit jealous: in Season 3 episode 18, he meets Hunter and asks Jan “Who’s the boy toy? Were you going to tell me you hired James Vanderbeak?” Well, the infamous Hunter returns again as Jan plays his song for the group. The song is essentially detailing an older woman having sex with him and turning him into a man. The words “So wrong, so right, all night, all right, ohhh yeaaah” blast as Jan dances sensually. Michael’s too thick to realize the song is literally detailing him being cheated on, but the rest of the group shares uncomfortable glances. Check out the song, it’s hilarious. Frank memorized the whole thing and serenades me with it whenever I’m upset. Works like a charm.

One of the funniest side plots reveals itself when Jan insinuates to Pam that Pam and Michael used to date. When talking about how messy his bathroom is, Jan says, “I don’t have to tell you. He couldn’t have changed that much since you two were together.” Pam is clearly dumbfounded, as Michael is the most repulsive, annoying, inconsiderate, un sexy person she’s ever met. She has never thought of him even remotely romanticly, so she frantically tries to express that to an unlistening Jan. As the episode progresses, whenever Michael and Pam interact, you see Jan staring daggers with an emotionless smile at the two. When the food is served, Michael whispers that it might be poisoned. Pam says to the camera: “I know the food isn’t poisoned, I know that. But, if she were trying to poison someone, wouldn’t it be me? Michael’s former ‘lover’?” Ha! Classic moment. Jan’s insanity is better revealed through the words of the dinner party guests. 

The climax of the episode is a Michael and Jan yelling at each other from across the table. Long story short, Jan gets angry with Michael so she starts loudly playing Hunter’s album yet again. There’s more yelling, which leads to Michael insulting her candle company and the fact that she’s tried to take advantage of his “rich friends” by getting them to invest. The argument digresses like this:

Michael: God, I would love to burn one of your candles.

Jan: You burn it, you buy it!

Michael: Oh good, I’d be your first customer!

Jan: You’re hardly my first!

Michael: THAT’S WHAT SHE SAID!

 Jan then proceeds to throw a trophy at Michael’s tiny “plasma screen TV,” breaking it.

I know she’s just a character, but God, it’s almost as infuriating as hilarious. I cannot even fathom being so angry that I destroy something of Frank’s. They should have left that relationship a LONG time ago! There’s no respect, no communication. Michael should have dumped her ass long ago. This is, in my opinion, the largest flaw of the episode. It’s difficult to balance absurdity and humor with reality, and I think the writers have flown the coop. Even though Michael is a dumbass and Jan is hot, I think he would have left that relationship earlier. Sure, he’s scared, he likes the security, his ideal life involves a wife and kids. Which leads me to my biggest point…

Michael revealed in this episode that Jan does not want kids! That tiny detail is not given enough attention. Michael reveals that he has had not one, not two, but three vasectomies because Jan has changed her mind so many times about children. “SNIP SNAP SNIP SNAP SNIP SNAP! You have no idea the physical toll that three vasectomies has on a person!” he yells, which I think is one of the best moments. The more I thought about it, though, the more it sat wrong with me. Michael’s one goal in life is to have children. That is a dealbreaker for him. Even if Jan were the perfect girlfriend, he would ditch her in a second if she meant he wouldn’t have a condo full of children! Her abuse is enough to make him want to leave, so it dumbfounds me that the two of those combined hasn’t pushed him out the door. Sure, you could say that Michael is truly that superficial that he would choose fake boobs over the life he’s always dreamed of. But, I think you and I both know that’s not true. I don’t think what we’re dealing with is the superficiality of Michael; that’s not a message the producers want to send. I think what we’re dealing with is a good old fashion plot-hole. I’m a bit disappointed that an episode filled with such comedic gold had such a, in my opinion, earth shattering fault. Frank wants me to add “no fake boobs are done well enough to make a man sacrifice that much.” How many fake boobs have you seen, Frank?! Haha!

Anyway, all in all, fantastic episode. I wouldn’t be a critic if I didn’t point out the mistakes! It’s hard enough to find a flaw in a show so perfect. What should I review next?!

Keep coming back and reading! Yours truly, Pat MacCarther (and her lovely husband Frank rooting from the sidelines).  

COMMENTS:

HereComesTrebble: lol Jan is psycho, you killed that. Best and worst character of the show!

HereComesTrebble: my wife and I love watching the show together too! How long have you and Frank been together? Great review.

JanMacCarther: @HereComesTrebble, we’ve been married for 

just over two years! It definitely makes the show more fun. I’m glad you liked the review!

AsstRegionlManger: I totally agree. It’s almost too absurd for the show… I know it has to be funny, but at a certain point, their relationship just is not believable! 

BrocoliRob: lol. Funny stuff. Done it again, Jane!

JanMacCarther: Thanks, @BrocoliRob!

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DECEMBER 29, 2019

Hello, hello, hello! Pat MacCarther here with another review. I’ve decided to do something a bit different today. I’m going to re review an episode! I rewatched the series another time, and honestly, my review of “Dinner Party” is pretty unfair. I was being hard on Jan.

I mean, yes, she is crazy. I am not denying that! But, certain little things can build up to push someone toward a breakdown like that. It could happen to any of us.

Firstly, I jumped to judge her relationship with Hunter a bit too quickly. I’m not saying it’s downright okay to have an affair with the man, but here’s where I’m coming from: she feels trapped in her job. She had to have some sort of inkling that she was going to be fired, and who is to say that Hunter wasn’t her saving grace at the office? Someone she could relate to, and honestly, trust deeply because he was her assistant, after all. I imagine she saw him as her closest friend. Michael was by no means the perfect boyfriend: he is annoying, stupid, and over the top. The two could not be more different. Sometimes, it’s healthy to rant to someone you’re close to about your relationship. Don’t even tell me you’ve never said a bad word to a friend about your husband or boyfriend? You know you have! Hunter just happens to be a boy. I have to assume that the two got closer than they expected to, and what the hell are you supposed to do? Just stop talking to him all together just because your boyfriend is threatened by him? You should not have to make yourself less happy than you could be just because someone feels uncomfortable. If we’re meant to be, it’ll work out. 

Also, I know this will be unpopular, but how can we possibly know that Jan and Hunter had an affair? I don’t know why everyone assumes that just because two attractive people work together that they have to get together. All we know is that Hunter wrote a song about a woman making him a man. Who knows if it’s Jan? I think everyone is jumping to far too many conclusions by assuming they had an affair. 

I just had to play devils advocate a bit here. Let me know what you think in the comments. You can play tie breaker for a little dispute Frank and I have been having. A dispute about the Office, of course. Can two people not be friends without everyone assuming its an affair?

COMMENTS:

MoMoneyMoProblems: have to admit, you lost me here a little...

Sprinkles: Honey. Jan cheated on him with a 20 year old. No justifications for that.

FrankMacCarther: I thought you were going to let me add my opinion! I think I have proof that Jan and Hunter had an affair, not that I need any because it’s so obvious. Here’s my theory, bear with me. Jan is very pregnant not even ten episodes later when we see her again in “Goodbye Toby.” Though the baby was clearly conceived during their relationship, Jan tells Michael it’s not his. She also tells him she didn’t cheat on him; that she went to a sperm bank when they were dating. While that is a hilarious moment and I believed it at first, when Pat and I got in this ‘debate,’ I started thinking about it more. Jan does not want children, bottom line. She never has, that’s a huge part of her character. I know it’s a leap, but I feel almost positive that the child is Hunter’s. Why would she go to a sperm bank to get pregnant with a child she doesn’t even want? We know the child can’t be Michael’s because she makes him wear two condoms. I also know, in my heart, that Jan Levinson has too much class to go to the same sperm bank that Kevin donates his stuff to. It’s not Michaels, it’s not the sperm bank’s. I can’t rule out Hunter, and that is ALL I am saying.

JanMaCarther: Oh, come on, Frank. 

TheBusinessBitch: Haha, funny theory, man! @JanMaCarther, listen to your husband on this one. I’d like to see more theories from you, Frank!

ALittleStitious: don’t read into it so much. Funny is funny.

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FEBRUARY 12, 2019

Hello again! Pat Mccarther here. I dropped the whole Jan Hunter topic for a few weeks because I got quite a bit of backlash. Not just from my readers. 

I feel pretty passionately about the topic, so I’m going to bring it back up again. Read it or don’t read it. 

I think Michael has a lot more to do with Jan’s ‘insanity’ than we’re all realizing. But, it’s so, so much deeper than him provoking her to make her crazy. I think that Jan is thinking realistically, even though her reaction might be extreme.

Let me paint a scene for you: you are so helplessly obsessed with your partner that your deepest insecurities come out. This idea is not original to The Office. It’s common. Insecurities arise when you’re so passionate about someone. Jan just decided to indulge on those insecurities, as many of you have done before. 

Let’s enter into Jan’s mind. Michael thrives in his office. He’s constantly laughing, working hard to build relationships with people, and working even harder to make the office feel like a home. Why, though, is he still searching for such approval when he has the approval of Jan at home? What is missing from their relationship that he has to bend over backwards to make others happy? Has he bent over backwards for her? Maybe he has. The thing is, it’s impossible to know if he does the same for her. It’s impossible for her to know, as well. All she has to go off is a gut feeling; something missing. All she can do is sit around and wonder. 

No WONDER in Jan assumes Michael and Pam have a thing for one another in
“Dinner Party.” She sees how great Michael is, and not only that, she feels that Michael is giving his all to those he works with. If she were to fall for Michael in a normal setting, she can’t even imagine how hard someone could fall for him when they see him thrive in his work environment, where he feels at home. 

The thing is, at their dinner party, they are at their home. Yet, he is more excited to have guests than he is to be alone with her. How can you feel secure in your relationship when you know the other person is happier elsewhere?

All of this may just be a little peek into the mind of Jan; there could be ten million other insecurities eating away at her. The dinner party was just a time where they all perfectly aligned. That’s why she went off the rails. She is not insane, nothing is wrong with her. She’s simply an emotionally damaged woman trying the only way she knows how to love someone. Why do you keep asking for more of her? Why won’t you just accept that and work harder to make it work?

ScottsTotts: are you delusional?! Michael hardly thrives in his office. They all hate him, lol! You’re losing me, girl. What?!

ZippityZoppity:… WHAAT?! LMAO! You could not be further off. Michael and Jan don’t work because they are HORRIBLE for one another! Why do you think he’s so much happier at work?! It has nothing to do with her ‘insecurities,’ babe. They aren’t meant to be. She’s looney, Michael’s an idiot, the two make a hilarious episode. End of story.

JanMacCarther: I’m sorry that I’m so cynical that I think 

Life isn’t so black and white. People aren’t just ‘meant 

To be.’ Relationships are formed from hard work and 

Dedication, it’s not all flowers and candy! You have to

Work hard to make something work in the real world.

FrankMacCarther: How hard is too hard?

JanMacCarther: so you can’t answer my calls but 

You can comment hate on my blog? Grow up.

JamaicanSunPrincess: Pat, you’ve lost me. Stick to what you’re good at. Reviewing funny episodes. I’ll read one more of these then I’m finding my office content elsewhere.

RyanStartedTheFire: Hey @jamaicansunprincess, chill. Pat,

I like what you’ve been doing. It’s nice to read about the

office but also be Challenged by different perspectives.

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FEBRUARY 24, 2019

Hi. Pat here.

I do appreciate most of your comments. I try to not take the nasty ones to heart, so thank you to everyone who is still supporting my blog through these random tangents. Sorry I haven’t written much more this month.

I’ve been thinking a lot about what some of you said. Maybe Michael and Jan just aren’t meant to be. Maybe the problems they’ve encountered are irrelevant to that large detail. I don’t know. It just pains me to see so many people make such a bold statement about the relationship when very few people have seen it up close. Maybe I should just listen to everyone.

HollyGram: Oh, honey. Are you okay? Don’t let everyone’s comments get to you. It’s just a TV show!

BearsBeatsBattlestargallactica: You don’t know shit about the office. Stop putting this trash online because nobody wants to read it. 

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APRIL 8, 2019

Hi all.

I haven’t gotten on the blog for a while. Personal reasons. 

I wanted to say fuck you! To all of you who trash my blog and give me hate. Fuck you all.

The thing is, though, I don’t really care what you think of me! I’ll take one out of Jan’s playbook. Nothing that happened with her and Michael is her fault. Nothing.

She TRIED! Is that not more than you can say? Let’s go to the beginning. She knew it was wrong for her and Michael to be together: she was embarrassed by him, thought he was immature, KNEW she was out of his league. But, despite all of this, she decided to give him a chance. THAT is where she went wrong: giving him a first chance. You can’t just go around being vulnerable with people like that, Jan. I think we all learn that the hard way.

So, she gets with him and he draws her in. Think about it. Jan Levinson was such a badass before she started dating Michael. She was a corporate badass. Thrived in her job and everyone respected the hell out of her, even if they feared her. She was calm and collected and clearly brilliant. She made the mistake of falling for someone who stripped her of everything.

Michael is the common denominator here. She was fired not long after she and Michael got back together for behaving erratically. One of her erratic behaviors? Getting a boob job and flaunting it. She only got a boob job for Michael. She never would have done that on her own, especially considering in the episode “Money” she talks about how horrible her mood swings have been with all of the painkillers. Michael has her under some kind of fuckboy spell that MAKES her get a boob job. She had no control over it. She also had no control over the fact that Michael’s mind games made her distracted at work, thus getting her fired. 

If you’re saying this isn’t Michael’s fault, you’re essentially saying the writers of the office suck. Why else would they create the character Jan as this intimidating, no nonsense badass at the beginning of the show? Then change her into this ‘crazy’ monster? Do you think they just changed their minds mid write and were like, ‘nah, lets make this bitch crazy for no reason! That would be funny.’ NO, they didn’t! Because they are brilliant. Jan turned crazy as a result of Michael. She was not crazy at the beginning. Now she is.

And, of course, society and EVERYONE watching blames Jan. Blaming the hysterical woman always seems like the easiest option, doesn’t it?! Well, here I am to stand up for her. And, to stand up for all women like her, for that matter. We are NOT crazy! We were sucked into the idea of a perfect man and fell for that idea so blindly that we didn’t realize everything we were losing. All men are like Michael. All men are the same. I’m tired of everyone blaming Jan for how things went down. Relationships are two sided, and if someone is ‘crazy,’ they were made that way. End of story. 

Go ahead, hate on me in the comments. I won’t read them. 

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APRIL 3, 2020

Hi everyone. Been almost a year!

I’ve been working up the courage to write for this blog again over the past couple of months. And I feel better.

Now that I have perspective, I’d like to take back what I’d said the last few posts.

Michael and Jan were not meant to be together. Everyone knew this except Jan. Everyone could see how much crazier the relationship was making her except Jan. Everyone expected Jan to have a complete mental breakdown, except Jan. 

Although I probably will never love him the same, I do remember why I loved Michael Scott so much at the beginning. He is a great man, just not the man for me.

Jan was crazy. 

Frank, I’m sorry.